Hale Kilinahe: The Journal

JANUARY 18, 1998 I didn't want to go to work today. Around 3 in the afternoon yesterday, I started feeling weird sharp pains in my belly. I called Dr. Boyens and he said to come in ASAP. It turned out to be nothing except a practice run for labor, but still, it was scary. First, it was the middle of rush hour and no emergency during rush hour is pleasant. Second, Century Center was on fire. Century Center is one of the tallest buildings in town. We saw the smoke from quite a way away. Fire makes me very nervous even when I'm not at all involved. We passed by it, so we didn't really know where the smoke was coming from until we caught the news later. So we got to the doctor's. Apparently, there was an escaped lunatic wandering around the hospital because Ryan said there were security guards wandering around the parking garage and one right in the middle of the waiting room. Dr. Boyens came in and examined me. He said he suspected something called placenta abruptio so he sent me for a sonogram. Nothing weird was happening, but we did get more pictures of Katie's tiny little face. I think Dr. Boyens wants me to go into labor this week. Next weekend is the big Stones concert and the Super Bowl, and I'm sure he paid big bucks for the Stones tickets. After the sonogram, he ran a test to make sure I wasn't leaking amniotic fluid and he joked that if he found anything wrong, he'd induce labor right then. Hey, I was all for it. Ryan has a three-day weekend, and anything to get out of work. When we got home, Ryan ran down to the ramen shop and brought us curry rice. I love curry rice. While we were eating, there was a knock at the door. It was our neighbor, Brandi, bearing a huge bag of baby stuff. I thought the curry was a treat. We've lived in the same building for so many years and I'd never even spoken more than three words to her, but there she was at our doorstep with all this stuff. She has a two year old and a very tiny infant--I didn't even know she was pregnant! She helps out with the maintenance in the building in exchanged for cheaper rent or something. I always saw her sweeping the driveway, her little boy playing quietly near her. The AC came back on today, coinciding neatly with the departure of the vog. The timing was perfect. Vog is smog, but it comes from volcanoes, as opposed to cars. It also started raining today. Work was still hard, though. I was just so tired that I wanted to nap in the boss's chair. Ryan wants me to work right up until the 26th, but I'm so tired! As it is now, I feel guilty. I need to pee constantly and I try to sit down as much as I can. My co-workers encourage me to take it easy, but I'm just hoping they don't feel that I'm slacking. (I'm watching my all time favorite movie, "Say Anything" "You must chill!") Meanwhile, my impending motherhood is days away. Nothing will ever be the same again, but it only hits me intermittently, when I'm sitting down, thinking about it. I have to live these last few days to the fullest, I guess. Somehow, I don't really realize that this is a major life change. I'm happy and excited, but I get happy and excited at the prospect of a nice dinner. I AM GOING TO BE A MOTHER! AAAAAAAGGGH! Am I not taking this seriously enough? < BACK | TOP | NEXT >